and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
