I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
