You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
and you fell through a lawn chair
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Randomize
