Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Everclear isn't food dammit
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
