Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Everyone says I win the strip club
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
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