I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
