is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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