I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Randomize
