How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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