I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I'm always down for nudity.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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