Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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