And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
