I want to make a zoo with you.
i would punch a child for taco bell
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
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