Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
