"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
