so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
