so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
whose parrot is this?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
