I think scott just propositioned me for sex
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Randomize
