That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I have already put on my inside pants.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
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