i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
