butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
