You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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