normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
