I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize