I accidentally had phone sex last night
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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