Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
