Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
