She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
