yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize