I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize