Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Randomize
