I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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