No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Randomize
