My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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