My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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