he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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