so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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