Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
