i don't plan on having that self control this summer
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
