Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
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