He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize