she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
