dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
