did you get engaged???
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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