their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I am available for nakedness
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
