remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
