omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize