his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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