Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
