2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Randomize